My Facebook status 8:15 a.m.: Wait. Something is wrong. We're ready early.
Yes, first full day of school in the new school year and we are 10 freakin' minutes ahead of schedule. While I'm a bit of an on time freak, we're almost never early.
But I jinxed it.
Because the children were entirely ready to go at 8:15 and I don't start the harassment to load into the van until 8:25, they seized on the opportunity to grab some computer time. Because the 12 thousand hours they had over the summer wasn't enough.
At 8:16 I told them we had about 5 minutes (I lie and add minutes into a slush fund. It's how we get places on time).
Jackson screeched "but we just got on!!!"
I was buoyed by the prospect of SIX HOURS in their absence and I maintained calm. "You have a few minutes then we'll go to school"
Jackson said nothing, but barricaded the door with furniture.
I cheerily pushed the door open and told them "Two minutes!" I also may have mentioned that Jackson (and Sydney if she cooperates with his conspiracy) would lose computer privileges if they fail to cooperate.
Two minutes later I told them time to get to the van. Then I had a human and furniture barricade to contend with. I went for the weakest link.
"Sydney you'll lose computer too if you don't cooperate."
"Mommy" she said thinking quickly "I'm trying to MOVE this chair so I can come."
Jackson was much less compliant.
"Jackson go downstairs now or you'll have no computer until Saturday."
He thought about it. He really hates to lose. He needs to keep something back.
"Okay I'll go, but I won't respect you."
I can live with that.